How Are You Feeling? What a Terrible Question.
How are you feeling?
I hate this question. I said it the other day though, and that is why I’m writing this article.
I was team consulting when I walked up to one of the players and asked him, “How are you feeling?” I then proceeded to mentally kick myself in the butt.
Why do I hate this question?
I hate this question because it prioritizes feelings. When we prioritize feelings, we don’t take the necessary action. You see…
Thoughts —> Actions —> Habits —> Identity/destiny
If we let our feelings control our thoughts, we won’t always take the necessary action to create the destiny we want. If we let our feelings control our thoughts we might:
Not get out of bed on time
Not go to the gym
Not get the extra reps
Not hit the pavement for a jog
Not ask for the raise we deserve
Not go talk to that cute person ;-)
Not change our lifestyle to align with our goals
WE MIGHT NEVER TAKE THE RISK
When you let your feelings rule over the kingdom of your mind, you’ll never become who you want to be.
A better question to ask yourself is, “Who do I want to be today?”
Who Do I Want To Be Today?
Jerry Rice asked himself a similar question every day he ran The Hill.
He ran the hill every day in the off season because he knew that if he wanted to be a champion, he had to outwork and be in better shape than everybody. He had to be in the best possible physical shape he could be so when the fourth quarter hit, he’d still be chugging. When the fourth quarter hit, he’d still be working. When the fourth quarter hit, he’d be able to launch himself past his competition and make plays no one else could make.
Jerry Rice asked himself, “Who do I want to be today?”
His answer, “A champion.”
His accolades:
1987 Offensive Player of The Year
1988 Superbowl MVP
Three Superbowl Rings ‘88, ‘89, ‘94
Played in 20 NFL seasons
Retired with 38 NFL Records
All-Decades Team for 1980s and 1990s
So the question to ask yourself is not, “How am I feeling today?” The question should be, “Who do I want to be today?”
When you ask yourself this, you start with the identity you’re seeking. Then you can align your actions and habits to become the person you know you can be.
Ex. You want to be more committed. When that is your answer, you’ll take the action you need in order to become more committed. You’ll get out of bed to get to the gym. You’ll walk out the front door to get your run in. You’ll stay away from the sweets, beers, and bread. Every time you get the feeling to not do one of those things, you’ll remind yourself that if you want to be more committed, then you must not give in. You must not give up. You must not be ruled by your feelings.
Making a great shot down the line in tennis doesn’t make me a great tennis player. Just like one act of loyalty doesn’t make you a loyal person. It’s consistently hitting that shot down the line. It’s consistently being loyal.
